When it rains...it pours....
The leaves I have in my hand are ones I picked up when I was in Michigan visiting my daughter...aren't they beautiful? Red, orange, gold...we don't see this in California. Picking these leaves up made me think of how life is a series of seasons...and with Fall I am realizing that I too am in a state of falling leaves. All I can do is pick them up, one by one, and see the beauty and promise in each. These leaves were green and new in Spring and lasted through the summer...now, with winter not too far away, they fall.

So, with all the changes, I've been reflecting about my life....I’ve been reading a book called “Getting through the tough Stuff” by Chuck Swindoll.

I hope today’s post helps you with where you are at with things in your own life. I know that in preparing this post, I heard God speaking to me and reminding me of who’s in control. It’s not me…although, sometimes I forget….do you?

Have you heard that saying that goes “When it rains it pours?”
Even though we are officially experiencing a drought in California, I will be the first to say that lately it’s been pouring a lot in my life.

Those unexpected phone calls, telling me that my dad had a medical emergency while he was in Italy …and Raija, my mother in law, collapsing all of a sudden from a sudden brain vessel bleed, undergoing 2 brain surgeries and still in ICU.

Through it all, I tried to understand the whys and the hows….but got no immediate answers or miraculous healings. The past few weeks have been a lesson in letting go and letting God do what He needs to do.

Letting go is all about giving up my control.

In Henry Nouwen’s book "Turn My Mourning Into Dancing", he says that
“The more we insist in control and the more we resist the call to hold our lives lightly, the more we have to deny the reality of our losses and the more artificial our existence becomes. Our belief that we should grasp tightly what we need provides one of the great sources of our suffering. But, letting go of possessions, plans, and people, allows us to enter, for all its risks, a life of new, unexpected freedom….."

He also writes that "God invites us to experience our not being in control as an invitation to faith"

God’s been gracious and good…My dad is under close medical watch and on the proper medications…Raija is still in ICU but breathing on her own and making a slow and steady progress .

All I can do is pray. I can’t control what will happen next , all I can do is control how I see things and how I trust God.

One of the best examples I could come up with about not being in control is flying. At some point, we all have experienced the fear and anxiety that occurs during a terrible flying experience.

Traveling to Michigan this past week was no exception. At first, prior to landing in Chicago, our plane experienced severe turbulence because of some serious weather. The pilot promptly confirmed that we were going to continue experiencing severe turbulence.

Not being a very calm flier, I promptly resorted to my way of coping with such a tense situation….which is to sing some of my favorite praise songs in my head….while tightly clinging to my husband's hand.

There isn’t much I can do at 35,000 feet. In fact, I am completely helpless and that realization often causes fear and anxiety in me. After landing safely in Chicago, we proceeded to board the next flight to Grand Rapids…a short 27 minute flight. However, as we prepared to leave the gate, the pilot calmly announced that we should go to the bathroom prior to departing since we were not going to be able to leave our seats once up in the air. He even said that the entire flight crew would have to remain seated for the duration of the flight. By this time, I was nearing an all out panic attack but I quickly focused my heart and mind on God and on what He tells us in scripture:

“Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”

How should we react to the turbulence in our lives? Can we do anything to keep it from happening? Ultimately, who is in control?

One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”