10 days, 10 states, 3,423 miles...

It's been a while but only because I needed the time to take it all in.

(Here I am with Stina and Jenny at 12,423 feet up in the Colorado Rocky Mountain National park....Yes! That is REAL snow!)

We embarked on our family road trip on June 24, the day after Stina's graduation party at the park. We made it to Zion National Park on the first day. The GPS kept track of our miles and reminded us to "take a break" once in a while.

While on the road, we saw all sorts of things, animals, people...and a lot of corn fields! There is a lot of open land in the Midwest. Our route went something like this:

Nevada, Arizona, Utah, Colorado, Nebraska, Wyoming, Iowa, Indiana, Illinois and finally Michigan.

With every mile, I realized that I was coming one step closer to that inevitable goodbye. On the 3rd of July, we stood in the Calvin College parking lot, car packed up and hugged one last time. I cried and she didn't....in fact, she was consoling me!
I didn't know what to think about her not crying but reasoned that this was her way of now worrying us by also falling apart.

So we were off to Chicago with Jenny too...most of the ride was quiet and every time I looked in my rear view mirror I began to cry. She wasn't there, behind us, like she had been all those miles and days...On the plane, I could hardly stand it and had to write notes to my hubby because talking about what I was feeling seemed overwhelming...

Coming home was strange. The house felt different. I walked upstairs to Stina's room...and just stood there feeling the miles between us. Her stuff on the floor, the unmade bed...I didn't care about the mess anymore and I wanted her there more than ever. Every time I missed her I'd just go into her room...I grabbed her little bunny that was on her bed and sobbed. Where did all this time go? Could this be real? Was it a dream??

Nigh time was harder yet...not being able to say goodnight. Looking our her bedroom window, I could see Jenny next door in her room, sitting on the computer. I know it's hard for her too...looking across and seeing this room empty.

The first few days I was a mess. I couldn't even talk on the phone with my friends.
With Stina though I maintained a calm voice....remembering how my friend told me to take deep breaths and sip on water as not to cry.

Motivation lacked and I couldn't do much...but little by little I felt better. Reading her blog gave me a sense of closeness, knowing what she was doing and discovering. I got back into my school since class was only a few days away and buried myself into the assignments.

Going back to work for a day, helping my friend reorganize her classroom sure helped out and got me excited about the upcoming new school year with my new job. I will be plenty busy working as the new resource teacher at both the middle school and high school...Isn't it amazing how this all worked out? God must have known that I needed some heavy duty distraction to keep me busy and my mind off the empty nest.

So, as I sit here peering over the edge of our empty nest...I am thinking about how I want to proceed going forward.A pile of papers, boxes and books are awaiting my attention as Tippy is sleeping at my feet. A dove just landed on the patio awning and is quietly cooing her song. The sun is out and the sky is clear and blue...summer is here.

Stina is off on her wilderness excursion for the next 10 days and will not be calling or posting on her blog. I hope and pray she is OK...